Mistakes

I didn't know what I have been thinking or doing recently.
Seemed that I ve done loads of mistakes unawarely.
What had happened to me?
I have been thinking a lot these two days,
but at last came out with nothing useful for the conclusion.
Damn!

I ve been so UNgenerous.
Just little bit of mistakes X ve done,
why should I treat X back like this?
How about the loves and cares X has given us through these months?
It's not gona be so easily forgotten.
That's just not me.
However, what I m doing these few days may hurt X deeply,
I clearly knew what I ve been doing,
I just wana let her know that X has hurt us too these few moments.
Honestly, I was being really cruel,
the first time in my life to treat a good friend of mine who ve done a small mistake in this way,

But.....
What about us?
Why leave us behind after asking us to accompany u?
Why leave us aside when u got someone for u and wanted us back again in the opposite circumstance?
NO, I DON WANT THIS.
SERIOUSLY,
What I ve been doing was just to make everything clear,
to tell u I DON LIKE U BEING LIKE THIS TO US.

Thinking back again,
How could I ve been so cruel to this good friend of mine?
I don't dislike X even X's with someone I dislike.
Instead, I still love X, as my good friend.
It's no jealousy, I knew that well.
Where was that niceR person X thought I was?
Was there some sort of evil spirit lurking deep within me?
I decided to stop everything I m doing now,
THIS ISN'T the REAL me
I don wana ruin everything before thinking about it carefully.
Luckily, matter hasn't turn DAT worse.
When everything is clarified and over,
I m on top of the world again.
=)

............................................................................................................................................................

Dear XXX,
complaints complaints complaints,
I knew I ve driven u crazy recently,
sorry.

SORRY SORRY SORRY...
actually SORRY is useless,
it doesn't help much after mistakes are really done,
DONe means DONE.
Some apologies are given over small matters,
ther's no need for that.
"I m improving myself for you",
I know u really meant it.
(Touched, grateful+guilt)


As you know, impatience is an inborn personality of mine,
Also,
I tend to not accept criticisms,
you know what i meant,
I know you are telling me what you really are thinking of the incidents,
but...
Support from you was all I needed and expected,
How about comforts?
Why instead of those,
what I got was some kinda criticisms which could really turn me even down?
Is there lack of understandings between us?
Need you here,
when will the day come?

Forgiveness is important for mistakes done,
the feeling of total forgiveness will be totally great.
Forgiveness is always in us,
didn't you realize that?
That's a good thing isn't it?

We have been feeling sorry for each other,
and I know you are not feeling good for that too.
I didn't know what to do.

*You will learn the most from the mistakes you make*
Hope this is true,
we still ve much to learn.
For the sake of everything


-At any given time, you know the right thing to do. Trust yourself completely-